For the purposes of this article, we’re going to assume that you’re either new to therapy or that you’re starting out with a new therapist.

And if that’s the case, you may be wondering what to talk about in therapy to help you open up and start easing into the therapeutic process.

Depending on your personality type and the issues you might be seeking treatment for, you may not want to immediately dive right into the deep end.

That’s ok, and it’s perfectly normal.

It’s the whole reason we wrote this short list of ideas for what to talk about in therapy in the beginning, so that you can gradually begin to approach the issues that you really want to get a handle on.

And if you don’t yet feel ready to go to your therapy appointments in person, remember that attending them online is always an option.

1. Personal Goals Related to Therapy

What is it that you hope to accomplish through therapy, and what do you want to talk about in therapy related to that goal and your plan for achieving it?

Do you just want to talk with someone and vent about things?

Do you have some compulsive habit that you want to break free from?

Or maybe you have a fear or some source of anxiety that you want ot overcome so that you can take back control of your life.

Big or small, humble or ambitious, whatever your goal is, talk about it with your therapist.

Not only is it a great icebreaker, but it’s also a very helpful piece of information for your therapist that will help them help you even more.

2. Relationships

This can mean romantic relationships, but most of the relationships in your life are probably not romantic ones.

From your relationships with your parents and other relatives to your relationships with your coworkers and that nice cashier you say ‘hi’ to every day as they give you your morning coffee.

Humans are social creatures, so it’s no shock that relationships usually top most people’s list of what to talk about in therapy.

Another important thing to note is that not all of your relationships will be obviously positive or negative, and most of them will have some measure of both positive and negative within them.

Humans and human relationships are complex like that.

Don’t feel like you have to only mention the negatives just because you’re in therapy, and try not to forget about the positive.

A large part of why you’re in therapy to begin with is probably to develop a more positive view of your life and your place in the world.

3. Your Previous Therapy Experience (If You Have Any)

This is a great and fairly neutral way to start a conversation with your therapist, and like other things on this list, it can also provide your therapist with valuable information they can use to better help you.

If you have never been to therapy before, a therapist can adapt their approach to suit your needs and ease you into things at a pace that is comfortable for you.

Likewise, if you have been to therapy before and had either a good or bad experience, telling your therapist about that experience and how it was for you will also help them modify their methods and approach to helping you resolve whatever problems have brought you into their office.

4. Anything You’re Stressed or Anxious About

It seems obvious that this would be on a list of what to talk about in therapy, but you’d be surprised by how often many people don’t want to open up about even minor issues that are not the deeper issues that brought them into therapy.

One common reason for this is that these individuals (and you may be one of them) have grown up in an environment or social context in which any sign of “weakness” is taken as an invitation to attack or as the proverbial blood in the water.

To put it another way, many people are so used to being excessively criticized and put down by the perception of their normal human behaviors as being somehow sub-standard that they close up entirely (which tends to make them even more stressed out).

In case it doesn’t already go without saying, you don’t need to worry about this sort of thing in therapy, and you can allow yourself to open up more than you may be used to.

5. Any Family History With The Issues You’re Having

A lot of the problems that bring someone into therapy are partially, if not mostly, influenced by genetics.

To some degree or another, your genetics influences everything from your political orientation to your predisposition to developing alcoholism.

And even if you don’t want to think of it in terms of biology and genes, consider that the exposure you’ve had to your other family members throughout your life is, by itself, sufficient to influence you in a significant way.

For example, suppose you grew up in a family where shouting and insulting each other was commonplace. In that case, you may not see it as abnormal and have difficulty establishing or maintaining relationships with people who didn’t grow up that way.

Go At Your Own Pace

As you’ve no doubt figured out, this list of what to talk about in therapy is not a long one and is not in any way complete or exhaustive.

The real truth is that therapy is for you, and your therapist is there to help you get through whatever it is that you’re going through.

Because of that, you don’t need to worry about boring your therapist or making them think something negative about you.

They’re you’re therapist.

Both of you know that they’re about to start becoming aware of certain things about you that you probably prefer to hide from most people.

That’s why patient confidentiality and standards of professional ethics exist.

So, when you’re struggling to think of what to talk about in therapy, just remember that you are not under any of the normal pressure to entertain or perform that you might be in everyday social interactions.

You can really talk about whatever you need or want to.

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